Self-Awareness and Authenticity in Entrepreneurship

We welcome David Ask, a resilient entrepreneur whose journey epitomizes the essence of grit and determination. From identifying a mundane problem to creating a product solution found in major retail chains, David’s path offers invaluable lessons in entrepreneurship.

Discover how he navigated the complexities of scaling his business, dealt with self-doubt, and leveraged mentorship to propel forward. This episode provides a comprehensive look at the entrepreneurial mindset, focusing on self-awareness, overcoming failures, and building robust support networks. Join us for an enriching conversation that will inspire and guide aspiring entrepreneurs.

Contact for David Ask

https://www.davidask.com/
https://statguardplus.com/
https://twitter.com/davidask
https://www.linkedin.com/in/thedavidask/
https://www.facebook.com/david.ask.18
https://www.instagram.com/thedavidask/
https://www.instagram.com/statguardplus/
email: hello@davidask.com

The Small Business Show is the official podcast for Garuda Promo and Branding Solutions. For more information visit

Website: http://www.garudapromo.com​​
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/garudapromo/​​
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/garudapromo
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/Garuda_Swire​
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/swirehothepromoguy
Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/garudapromo/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Garudapromo88/videos
Twtich: https://www.twitch.tv/thesmallbusinessshow
Linktree: https://linktr.ee/thesmallbusinessshow

#thesmallbusinessshow​​​ ​​​ #gaurdapromobranding​​ #smallbusinessmatters #smallbusinessstrong

Transcript

0:18

The Small Business show is the official podcast of Garuda promo and branding solutions. Hello everyone, you're listening to the small business show. I'm your host swire. You can also call me the promo guy. My guest today, David S. From current Global LLC. David also led to a successful entrepreneur who product thestatgadplus.com is now available in over 3700 retail stores including giant like the Home Depot, Lowe's and true value hardware. He's currently working on his book titled the Guardians of Grit which aims to empower father in raising unquestionable young people. Granted, in science based approach that distinguish between grit and resilience, David explore how knowledge can fundamentally shape one calls identity. Welcome to the show David. Hey, thank you for having me. Pleasure to be here. Seems like you have a lot going on and you know, you're writing a book, you're running a business for listener who are tuning in, you know, how did you decided to start your own business? And can you tell us a little bit about the backstory? Yeah, sure. So, you know, it's interesting, I grew up in a little town in Minnesota. I now live in Nashville, Tennessee. But I was always drawn to people who were business owners and, and really the entrepreneur type. I was always fascinated by people that kind of had multiple revenue streams and things like that. And I kind of had this idea that someday I would kind of head in that direction, but I really didn't have any idea what that might be. So about ten years ago, my brother in law called me one day and he said, hey, David, where do I get a thermostat guard with a combination lock? He said, everybody keeps losing that little key. Well, what was interesting is I was actually working for a large telecom chain in facilities management and, you know, over, I don't know, multiple states. And of course, and, you know, every one of our locations we use thermostat guards because everybody kept messing around with the temperature. And of course it got pretty costly and caused a lot of problems. And I knew of course, when he brought that up, that that lost key problem was a real issue. So, long story short, he and I went into business together and developed a product. I ended up buying him out shortly after that and then ended up kind of fortuitously getting some traction in retail with Home Depot and Lowe's and just recently this year with true value hardware. I'm just grateful that I found something that was valuable in the marketplace and I'm one of those people that I don't care if I'm selling whatever widget it is. I just so appreciate just the, the opportunity, you know, to have product that is valuable and that people like. And I think I like being creative. I like marketing. I like shaking hands. I like selling. I like doing all the things that, you know, that go into selling a widget. And again, I'm just grateful I found something that was valuable in the marketplace. You know, classic entrepreneur spirit. You went all in into your ventures. I've been wanted to ask this question, and I think, you know, you probably can answer this pretty well. What makes you decided? I'm going all in. Like, I don't, just wanted to tiptoe into it. If I'm going to do it, I'm going to all in. Can you talk about that mindset a little bit? Yeah, you know, it was a little bit of a progression. So, you know, initially when, when I started that with a partner, you know, kind of the load, as it were, was carried by, you know, two of us, so it didn't necessarily seem as scary. What was kind of interesting, though, is there was a point in the business that I had a choice to make because our initial distributor went out of business and I had to, you know, on my own then say, well, I need to make new, you know, plastics injection molds for this, you know, thermostat guard and order some product. And, well, of course, that was tens of thousands of dollars. And, you know, it's funny, I hang out with a lot of, a lot of people whose risk meter is, you know, a ten. And I would say that mine is probably a three or a four. So that was a, that was a season for my wife and I that, you know, was, it was difficult because in order to do that, you know, we had to, you know, kind of put every penny into it. The nice thing is, at that point, of course, we had already sold some products, so I knew that it wasn't necessarily that we were going to just completely lose our money. At the same time, it wasn't guaranteed that we were going to find placement, you know, real quickly. And of course, in retail, which seemed at the time honestly like a complete. Pipe dream, what if you think you didn't go all in? Like, what do you think would happen? Yeah, you know, I probably would have had, you know, 10,000 thermostat guards sitting in a garage still. And, you know, it's, it's a hard thing. You know, when, when you say go all in, I think what's really the kind of behind all of that is, you know, the person in the mirror, right. It's like you're looking in the mirror thinking, do I have what it takes? Not just, you know, literally financially, you know, scaring up some cash is not necessarily a hard problem. You know, if you have a product that is viable, the real issue quite often is, do I believe that I have what it takes to call a billion, multi billion dollar, you know, corporation and have that conversation to stand in that room and so out of the gate, you know, I mean, yeah, suffered a lot of imposter syndrome and, you know, just a lot of fear. And of course, you know, you just push through those things and once you kind of get a win here and here, win there, you know, the confidence kind of starts to build and so on. At the same time, you know, it was fascinating back then. I started doing some deeper work, you know, kind of internal work, building self awareness, you know, and that kind of thing as to who I am and who I'm not and to make decisions based upon, you know, the things that I value and to show up in a way that's authentic to me and not try to parrot, you know, or mimic someone else that I, you know, might have looked up to. I really want. I think that was a really interesting season of life. I really wanted to operate, you know, in a way that was, yeah, that was me. And to build relationships, you know, that were authentic and so on. And I still do that, but it was, it was kind of a neat season of life. I felt like there were two worlds colliding this, this external world, as it were, of entrepreneurship and then this internal world of, you know, me kind of rising into the, you know, the, the truest version of myself. So it was a real pivotal time of life for me. Yeah, that's very interesting. And I think I need to ask you this follow up question, and since you been through the experience and obviously don't give us all your secrets, right. Working with a larger organization, you know, in your case, maybe a hundred times bigger. Like sometimes we, we do come upon something like that, an opportunity. Right. So we're in business for a while, so we're doing good work. And maybe, you know, a competitor, not a competitor, maybe a company who is 100 times or much larger than us to buy from you. So obviously the term is most favorable to them. Right. You do a lot of things. You might need to get more machine, hire more people. You know, maybe you have to hold the product development phase for a little bit. Can you walk us through that process? Like, how do you make sure that at the end financially, it works for you at the end. I'm making money. Right. That's why I'm getting into it. And then you're able to produce or perform what they ask of you, like, can you talk to us a little bit about that? Yeah. Yeah. So I'll kind of tell you the story, really. So I remember the day that I got the call. You know, we had had multiple conversations and so on, and I was actually sitting on the tarmac at Nashville International getting ready to fly somewhere, and I got the call and, you know, they said, hey, David, we would like to move forward. We really like your product and we'd like to put you in our stores. And the one question from them was, can you do that? I mean, really, right. There's a lot of products out there that would sell. There's no question, right. The real estate on those shelves is worth a lot of money, and they're responsible not only to their own upper management, but to shareholders. So they protect that real estate very, very tightly. The question of, can you do that? It's a really legitimate question, meaning, do you have the money to buy inventory, to stock the shelves one time in 2000 stores, let alone keep another 20,000 units sitting around to restock in another container on the water? Do you understand supply chain management? Are you well capitalized in order to pull this off? And it's funny is in that moment, I remember listening to Richard Branson, Virgin Atlantic, and he said, when an opportunity comes your way, say yes and figure it out. So in that moment when he asked me, can you do this? Well, on a very practical level, the answer was absolutely not. I've got a great job, but not only do I not have the business acumen to pull that off, but I didn't have the capital. But I said, absolutely. And it was interesting how, you know, the other opportunities kind of presented themselves. So I ended up finding a partner and licensing my product to them. And they've been a really great partner for, I guess, seven years now. So they handle retail, you know, for me and then, you know, other in manufacturing and so on, and then I can, you know, use those same units to sell elsewhere as well. So it's been a really, really great opportunity. And I remember, by the way, one of my mentors, it would have been his birthday today. He passed away a few months ago. His name is Dan Miller and he wrote the book 48 days to the work you love and no more Mondays. And I'm just a wonderful human being, but I remember when I got that call, I called Dan, and he'd been there, done that. He was an older man who'd been around the block a lot, kind of started asking me really helpful questions and starting to identify the gaps and, you know, things and people that I needed to, you know, to partner with and so on. And it's amazing, you know, this idea of saying yes to something and figuring it out. It's not how, you know, or there's that book. Right? Who, not how. It's rarely how. It's quite often who are the who's, you know, that you need in your life to help you enter that next, you know, that next phase and level up. I was grateful to have someone hold my hand during that time and help me to find the right people. Thank you. David. I think you sounds really calm. You make it sound easy, but I think at that time you are running around and thanks for sharing that story. It's really wonderful to hear that you answered that call. You figure it out. And now you're successful in the products that you do. Yeah. And to your point there, right? Did I have a lot of sleepless nights? You're darn right I did. And I can't tell you how many nights I, you know, laid in bed at three in the morning. Like, what in the world am I even doing here? And, you know, it's kind of interesting, you know, when you start leveling up to certain seasons of life, you know, it's my, by the way, I mentioned earlier this imposter syndrome. My friend Chris Kelso, he actually wrote the book overcoming the imposter. And in his book it was super helpful for me. He said that you need to change your vocabulary from imposter to explorer, meaning if you're doing something new, you know, on any level, you're busting new ground, right? You're busting sod out west or whatever that is. You're not an imposter. Of course you don't have what it takes. Of course you don't know what to do. Of course you don't know how to handle something. You've never done it before. So you are an explorer. And, and that paradigm really started to shift, you know, my ability to lean in and do hard things and, and navigate the, you know, the man in the mirror, as it were. Yeah, I love that. And I want to use another sports analogy. I remember, you know, my daughter, one of her coach in soccer said, you know, you can never score a goal if you don't shoot. Like, yeah, you have to try it. Like, you'll miss. Right. You know, and then you might not able to score for a while, but if you never shoot, you never score. Yeah. And it's, you know, what's interesting, too, is, you know, this idea of shooting and scoring. A lot of people, you know, I'll just ask the question, why don't some people take the shot? And I think it's because they're just afraid that if they miss, somehow they will be a failure. Right. It's kind of an identity statement, you know, it's an internal identity dialogue that's happening that if I don't succeed in this area, I am something. And if I do succeed, I am something. You know, when you really start getting down to the kind of brass tacks, we realize, no, I'm not whatever that is. Right. I'm not a doctor. I'm not a plumber. I'm not an entrepreneur. That might be something that I do that's a context for how I express myself. And of course, I'm going to see wins and losses and things like that in, in all areas of life. But I think that, you know, when we, you know, are shooting for something big, you know, as it were, you know, we tend to have a lot of fear because we're afraid that if we fail that somehow we become, you know, something less than. And it's that fear that you just have to, honestly, you've got to get up in the morning, you know, grab that fear by the back of the neck and throw it out the window and just get rid of it because it's unfounded. It's a falsehood that we really need to understand for what it is. Well, but if you show me a person who miss or fail in what we're talking about but still remain in the game, I would say that person do the experience. Imagine that you're shooting, you're missing a. You still at it. So then, you know, that I learned from my mistake. Maybe I have to do this better or maybe I have to prepare in a different way so I could get better. So I would assure you that, you know, that person had that experience and eventually, you know, they're going to get better. Yeah. Yeah, I love that. And it's, you know, who do you want advice from, right? You want somebody who's got some scars. You want somebody who's been, you know, down the path and been punched in the face a few times and, you know, kept getting up. And quite often we, you know, we look to the people for advice that look all shiny and fancy and this and that, and it's just, it's a big facade. I want somebody who, who can look at me and say, david, I know where you've been. You know, you've got this. It's, it's going to be okay. And let's do this. This lead on to a great segue. You know, David, you have talked about the mentor that you have, and I know that you belongs to a couple of different mastermind group. And you put this on the notes that you sent me, and I think it really resonated with me. And elaborate on this, please. You became the people you spend the most time with. Why do you say that? And how do you think that really changes? By spending time with the right people. Yeah. So I got that from Jim Rohn. You know, you become, like the top five people you spend the most time with. Well, here's, here's, I'll just kind of drill into the ground, you know, why is that a law like gravity? Well, guess what? Those of us who have children, you know, we know very instinctively we don't want our children hanging out with the wrong crowd. Right. I don't want my kids hanging out with the thugs. I don't want my kids hanging out with people who look like you're going to rob somebody. Why? Because we know full well that our children will be, you know, they're going to rub off. So. But here's the funny thing. We often don't think about that for ourselves. You know, life kind of gets busy and, you know, you just, you become more of a human doing than a human being, and you don't think about some of those things. And I, what's amazing is, and I'm not saying that we can't have friends and acquaintances and so on, but that inner circle, the people that you let into your inner world, the people that you talk about, your dreams and goals and gaps and wins and pitfalls and struggles and things like that. You want people that are going to tell you the truth. You want people that are doing hard things. You want people that have some grit inside of them that are leaning in not only asking for your help, but saying, you know what, David? I want to help you cross the finish line. Let's do this. So it's a big deal. You know, again, those, the people that you let into that inner world. Yeah. I think you could put in a lot of different examples by what you just said. You know, for example, I'm in sales, right? So maybe there is an industry that I know nothing about. Like, if I go to people that seems to know what they're doing it. If I hang out with them long enough, I will probably learn more about that industry, learn more about the pitfall that I shouldn't be stepping in first. As with the kids example, our kids makes a joke. We're asian, say, oh, we only want to hang out with people who get AIDS. Right? It's kind of a joke, but we're nodding at the end. But not just for the AIDS, but a good person, good human being. Like people who, using elementary school analogy, the teacher said, you want people who, who fill your bucket, and you don't want people who dip into your bucket. So I think that really sticks into my mind, like, so simple. And then they teach it in, I think, kindergarten, but I still use that, you know, you want people to fill your bucket, so eventually, you know, you could share, you know, the. The water in your. In your bucket, so you know that what comes around goes around. Yeah, I love that. It's. Yeah. Yeah, it's, it's interesting. There's some people, you know, when you come in contact with them that they have a, there's a generousness about their spirit. You know, there's a. They're, they seem like they're full and they're kind of just splashing out everywhere, as opposed to some people that you're around who are a bit more fear based. And, you know, they guard their words. They're, they're, they're really. It's like their eyes are just looking at themselves all the time, as opposed to looking at opportunity and ideas and, hey, what does that person need? And how can I, you know, connect that dot or do that kind of thing? And I. Yeah, that's a, it's a real paradigm, you know, shift, you know, for some folks, and I'm with you, though, that this idea that someone would, you know, add to the bucket, you know, as it were, as opposed to take away, is. It's almost kind of, it seems kind of, I don't know, hateful or something, to say that out loud. But guess what? That's the reality. That's the world we live in. And I think sometimes if you look hard enough, you could find the people that you think are close to you, and sometimes that will be scary. So, especially if we are depressed or if we feel the failure, if you look, there are a lot of people who looks like you. But ask yourself, do you want to be in that stage for a long period of time? And sometimes we have to break our own circle, because if you say you're going to be better if you say, let's say, for example, you want to quit smoking, then stop hanging around with people who smoke. Yeah. Yeah. Isn't that funny? That's a good way to, good way to put it. I remember for a, cease was back in my twenties. I started hanging out with some people who just seemed to complain a lot. And it was kind of funny. Like, there was, I mean, we would even go to a restaurant and nothing was ever good enough. They complained to the waiter about something, or I, you know, things like that. Not that there aren't moments where you might need to say something, but it was such a pattern. And I found myself, like, you know, trying to avoid them. And after a few months, I'm like, I don't want to. I don't want to be like that. I don't want to be somebody who's always looking for, you know, the negative and other people are looking for mistakes or things like that. And I felt like their radar that was up was, you know, kind of this dark cloud as opposed to, you know, man, I wonder if there's, this person needs me. Like, how can I encourage them? How can I, you know, give, give life to them? Let's talk about self awareness. I think this is a really important piece, not only to young people, to entrepreneur. It just, we're going through a lot, right? Every day we have operations that we handle, maybe we have families that we have to take care of, and then we have some alone time. And then I feel sometimes I catch myself, too. I talk down to myself. But if I know that with your example, if I hang out with people I know, that will cheer me up. And if I hang out with people I know, always they will have something smart to say. You know, if I listen to them just maybe talk for 510 minutes, I feel better. So how do you think that self awareness piece comes to mind, you know, for entrepreneur? Oh, man, great, great question. I think that, you know, there's, there's a, it might be one of the things that's missing most in people. And so, you know, that's, which is kind of a big, a big statement to make. Let me dip into these waters this way. My favorite quote is by a guy named Benjamin Disraeli. And he says, the greatest good you can do for another is not to share with him your riches, but to reveal to him his own. So ultimately, what is self awareness? So if someone were to ask you the question, who are you? Well, what, what do you describe? Right? Are you, are you. Well, I am a plumber. I am a lawyer. I am a roofer, whatever. Oh, no, you're not. That might be what you do for a living. In fact, there's a funny movie called anger management that. Where they. They have a moment, you know, where this guy Dave sits down, you know, who are you? And he starts describing, you know, what he does. Wait, no, no, no. I want to know who you are, Dave. And he's, you know, it's Jack Nicholson and Adam Sandler. It's absolutely hysterical. But it's. It's funny because I think as a society, we really kind of resonate with that, right? We become identified. Right. The word identity by extrinsic descriptions or nomenclature. Like, you know, we let other people define us. So one of the things that I do when I coach people, I work closely with doctor Andy Garrett, and I, he has a program that he called the true north blueprint. And I love this idea of true north versus magnetic north. Magnetic north, like a compass. You walk into a room, as it were, and the compass is kind of bouncing back and forth trying to find north, and it's literally reading the magnetic field around it. Well, we often do that when we enter a room, and we're just kind of reading the room to see where do I fit in? And, you know, and if we're in a really bad place, it's like we're wanting someone. Would you please just tell me who I am or tell me that I'm good enough or, you know, we're looking for this extrinsic validation, and not that we don't need some of that, of course, but the true north is what? True north is a plumb line. Like, back in the day, right? They didn't have a level when they built a house. They literally used a plumb line, which is way more accurate than a level. It's literally 100% vertical. So, inside of us, when we describe, for instance, core values, and I like to say, what is it that your core. I'm talking the essence of who you are, what does your core happen to value the most of all the roughly maybe 80 english words that describe core values, what are the hierarchy of those things? And it's fascinating because those of us who've done some work in this area, if you start identifying core values, convictions, they're different. What do you believe is right and wrong? Virtues. Virtues? Is this idea of what type of a dent do I want to have on someone else? It's outward focused. What is it that I like to say by the way, what is it that gives your goosebumps goosebumps. What is it that makes the hair on the back of your neck stand up in a good way? What is it that puts that lump in your throat in a good way? What is it that breaks your heart? What is it that you're willing to die for? What is it that you're willing to live for? When you start describing all of these things, guess what? It's going to look very, very different from the person next to you. And when all of those various things start colliding, right? That's who you are. The context might be your career. Right? The context might be whatever happens in your home. The context is what we're doing right now. I'm having a conversation with somebody that I've never met in person, but I'm bringing, I hope, the fullest expression of who I am, you know, to have a great impact on you and your audience. And so self awareness is way more valuable than. Yeah, than most things. And I'm going to actually dip my toe in the philosophical, spiritual waters here for a minute. So the question is, where do we get the word authenticity? Right? It comes from the word authorization. We did not make us. Right? I didn't make me. I didn't choose my eye color. I didn't choose my taste buds. Guess what? I didn't choose my personality. And those of us who have children know that our kids come out of the gate very different, very hardwired. Within just weeks and months, you can tell, you know, their sweet little essence is so different. And as children are growing, they're not thinking, you know, like you and me. They're not thinking about being authentic. They're not thinking about, you know, their place in the world. They're just doing their deal and acting out of alignment with who they are. When life happens, right, they get slapped around a little bit and they get hurt. Well, then you start to question, well, maybe I'm not enough. Maybe, you know, I don't have what it takes. Maybe the things that I love are I'm going to get laughed at. I mean, you, you know, we start to question all of that stuff. Well, then you go through this phase, and doctors call it, you know, in your late teens, early twenties, self actualization. Well, I'll be honest, I don't. I think some people don't go through that. They choose to, you know, they just choose to be a human doing and not a human being. And what's neat, though, is when you self actualize and hopefully, you know, you have parents, you know, who raise you right, cause you to rise. They're asking you questions like, you know, hey, David, what do you value the most in this life? Let's get out of pencil and paper and start identifying right identity. Literally just writing these things down. What is your, what does your core happen to value? Let's talk about strengths. Well, let me tell you what I see, right? You're holding up a mirror, you know, to those around you saying, do you see what I see? This is awesome. And, you know, identity and authenticity is not formed in by answering great questions alone. You have to. But it's. We're made for relationships. So young people need to be raised. They need to be told, hey, dude, you're awesome. And I just, I not only love you, but I like you. And let me tell you what I like and what I love about you. And then they dare to believe that those, you know, the greatest good, you know, those, the hierarchy of things in them is worth expressing and exploring and things like that. And I just think that's, yeah, that again, self awareness is really, what is it, it's labeling the richest parts of you and then living out of that richness and helping others do the same thing. Yeah, thank you for sharing. I think that topic alone, those two words, can, we can spend another hour just talking to you. That I think you're right. You know, your parents, you're going through what the kids are going through. And sometimes, you know, with self awareness, you know, now they have self image even for entrepreneur, we grown up have an image of what a successful entrepreneur looks like. They gotta have their private jets, they're gonna have like seven cars, they're gonna have all these watches. But maybe that's, that's good. It's nice to have, but you don't need all that to be able to be successful. You know, a lot of people that names we might never heard of are very successful entrepreneur only. If you get to know that industry or in that category, then you find these famous people who you might never heard of. And I think by going through the awareness and a lot of time, our image, especially with the day and age of social media, we have to appear to be success on our social media posts and we have to have all this and that. We have something like that. I think it kind of messes people up. Like in that case, if you have your mentor, you develop your skills in the old days and you develop maybe 510 years, then you on your road to success. But now with social media, you have to be like that in the next 30 days. If not, you fail. That's right. Sometimes we get people tell us that. Sometimes I think it messes up the self awareness because as you mentioned, David, it will take your time to go through that search. Maybe to talk to the right people, maybe to fail a couple of times to be able to find who you really are. And if you ask kids, teens, what a call value are, you know what they would say? I don't know. Well, most adults don't know. Honestly, it's really stunning when you start walking into these waters with people how kind of, you know, kind of clammed up they get because it's, you know, they don't know how to answer these questions. So here's what's fascinating. You talk about success, you know, like I like that question. What is your definition of success? Well guess what? If you don't know who you are and what you value, right? Your definition of success, your, your view of the world and identity and authenticity and all that kind of stuff, it's going to be somebody else's and it's not going to be yours. What's really fascinating is when Doctor Andy says, how do you know when you have identified who you are and you start living from that place? Well how about this? How do you know you haven't found it? Well, anxiety, depression, avoidance apathy, social anxiety. There's so many negatives that, that come with living outside of your own soul. Well how do you know you found it? Well, you start to feel genuine, you start to feel free, you start to feel natural. You start to enter situations in groups of people with, you know, a generousness as opposed to, you know, a twelve year old standing in the corner like, you know, pick me, pick me. So self awareness is absolutely vital. You will never find success unless you are self aware. How about this? What if you are living a successful life but you haven't given name to it? Literally, you might have actually stumbled into a successful life. Your family is happy and healthy, you're doing activities that you enjoy, you're using your strengths to the fullest. But if you've not done the work, if you've not done the self awareness work to give those things value and to hold weight to them and to name them, you won't be experiencing the fulfillment that you're looking for. So it's kind of a complex subject in a lot of ways. If you don't have self awareness, guess what your definition of success might be? Joe Rogan's. It might be your dad's. It might be your brother's, it might be whatever political figure you happen to look up to. But once you. Again, once you've identified that plumb line, you've identified the goosebumps, you've identified what you value, all that stuff. All of a sudden, you know, success starts to look like something, and you can relax into it, as opposed to white knuckle your life and try to generate something. Yeah, I agree 100%, David. And to the listener, you could have self awareness, the discussion inside your head in different stages. Right? So when we talk about success, you know, for some people, $500,000, it's. A lot of money, is successful, you know, but sometimes we have billionaires who have $5 billion things, they're not successful. So I think if you haven't figured out that part, do you spend some time on it to do that? Because if you, let's say you are Elon Musk for a day, right. Do you really want to go through all the things that he's going through in a daily basis? Yeah. It's your relationship. Or if you're little hobbies that you have, are you able to have time to do all those hobbies? So even if you trace spot with whoever you think is successful, like, do you really want that already for it today? Yeah. You know what? You know, it's interesting. I'll just be a little bit vulnerable here. So. So, a couple weeks ago, I bought a pickup from my brother in law, and it's. It's 19 years old. It's, you know, it's almost two decade old pickup. It's kind of rusty in the bottom and this and that, but I really liked it, and I wanted it. Could I go buy a new truck? Well, sure, but. So today, my wife was. She loves going to estate sales and yard sales and to, you know, thrift stores and everything else. And I told her about a week ago, I said, hey, I kind of want to get one of those cabinet things that sits in the back of a pickup. You can put your tools in, and I don't even know what you call those, but. So Lisa was over at goodwill this morning, and she sends me a picture of this toolbox, whatever, and she says, hey, you know, I think this will fit your truck. It's only $30. And so here's. Here's my definition of success today. Right again. Could I go buy a truck and a, you know, one of those bed tool holder things? Yes. My definition of success is my wife gets a total kick out of finding something at a thrift store that I like, that's just. She loves doing that. And I know full well that when she takes a picture and I'm like, way to go. That's awesome. Like, she just lights up. I found David something that he kind of likes. Like, she get. She gets totally jazzed about that. And I would much rather have that experience driving a 19 year old pickup with a dollar 30 tool holder, whatever, in the bed of the truck that Lisa found, because it brought her joy, right? And a lot of people would think, wait a second. If I don't have the latest and greatest everything, people are going to think that I'm poor, or people are going to think that I'm not successful. Guess what? I have a wife of 25 years who loves me. I've got a son who just finished his first year in college who's just a magnificent human being. I've got a daughter who I get to do concerts with. I'm a vocalist, and she's a first chair violinist at Vanderbilt at Children's orchestra. You know, the love that we share as a family inside of our modest home and the quality of conversations and the bond that we have is so far superior to whatever pickup or whatever object of choice, you know, that you could name that would somehow give me one dopamine hit from somebody, you know, giving me the look like, oh, nice truck, dude. You know, but guess what? That has come. Because I've been through some hard times. I've been through some fire. I've been. I've been through a furnace of sorts that's. That's burned away some of that silly stuff in my heart. Back in my twenties and thirties, I guess what? I probably would have appreciated a really nice truck. And because I would want people to think that somehow David Osk has arrived. Now my badge of honor is driving an old pickup where the stereo doesn't even work and there's a tape deck in it. And my wife just found me a $30 tool holder that I don't even know what the name of that thing is, because it gives her joy. I feel like that moment today, especially when I go out there and, you know, in the driveway here and put it in there, and she gets the joy of seeing the expression on my face, that's rich. You know what I mean? That is rich. And it has nothing to do with money, has nothing to do with anything, except I have a great relationship with lisa. I'll say one other thing here, too, and I forget where I first heard this. So I think that if someone wants to start this journey of self awareness. I'll just make a big truth claim here and I'm quoting someone else and I just forget who it is. But they said that life is all about relationships, period. It is, period. Like the entire point of the human existence is relationship. And what's really fascinating is the rest of it can be a really nice context. I mean, some of it's actually pretty horrible, but there's a lot of beauty and stuff in life. But when you put the relationship, well, hopefully with you and God first, and then that relationship with me, myself, and I. Right. Love your neighbor as you love yourself. Get to know who you are and the riches that God put in you, then you know what you can give away. You know what's inside of you to hand to someone else. And that's when life starts getting really rich. The rest of it is just a context to experience relationship in. Thank you so much for sharing, David. Like, you open a big box of question that I can no longer being general and individualized for that question. So for a listener who really wanted to ask you more about finding themselves, what the success looked like, what would be the best way to reach out to you? And can you talk a little bit more about your new book? Oh, yeah. Thank you. So I'm writing a book called the Guardians of Grit, and I'm really excited about it. There's a larger movement that I'm working on with some partners here, but this book is largely driven toward men, to dads. Again, it's going to benefit anybody, but it's this idea of what is grit? Well, grit is I'm going to do hard things over a long period of time, because what's on the other side of the hill, as it were, is worth fighting for. Why is grit important? It's because your life is built on decisions. If you don't have the ability to make decisions in the face of fear and hardship, you're not going to have a good life, period. And if you do have the ability to do hard things over a long period of time, you're going to build not only a home, right? You're going to build a castle. You're going to build a kingdom. That's really fun to live in. And again, back to the book here. It's like this idea of a guardian. Well, what is that? What's a guardian of grit? A guardian of grit is kind of what I alluded to earlier. It's someone who is holding up a mirror, you know, to their son or daughter or to their, you know, the athlete, if they're a coach, right, to their, if they're a mentor to whoever they're mentoring, and they're saying something like, hey, look at this. Do you see what I see? You know, let me. Let me mirror back to you the riches that I see in you and validate those things. It's if you see something, say something. And again, it's not nice shoes or nice shirt. It's you're galvanizing and validating character strengths and those things that, again, convictions, values, virtues, goosebumps, all that kind of stuff you're saying, hey, by the way, when you said this yesterday, that was awesome. I hope you do more of that. So I'm really excited about that. And as far as getting a hold of me, my website is David, ask David a s K.com and you can email me@helloavidask.com. Dot David, thank you so much for coming onto the show today. Like, we had discussed a lot of open ended question. There's no right or wrong. And I think, you know, the most important takeaway that I, that I have for everyone today is, you know, just to really go through our self awareness journey and, you know, really find out who you are. Do you really want seven cars or do you only like, David won one car that he wanted, and then he will be happy. So it could save you a lot of money, too, at the end. Yeah, that's right. Sure can. Yeah. Thank you so much for coming onto the show today. Pleasure. Thanks for having me. Thank you for listening to the show. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe to the podcast and share with your friends or colleagues who might benefit from the conversation. Any questions or feedback, feel free to reach out to me on LinkedIn. I'd love to connect with you.

Our show is live stream both on YouTube and LinkedIn every Tuesday at 10: 42:45

00 p.m. pacific standard Time. I'll see you next time.